Friday, November 17, 2006

What Did I Do Wrong?

I've ranted about Texas before. And here I go again. Apologies in advance to C or any other native Texans who may be reading this. I kid because I love.

If my mock trial team is (un)lucky enough to place well enough at the regional competition, we will be traveling to Texas to for the National Trial Competition finals. Houston, no less - the land of no zoning ordinances.

I have been fortunate enough to avoid Texas for 23 years; I was hoping to avoid it for at least a few more.

The whole Texas attitude just weirds me out, the way that Texans are so SUPER DUPER PROUD of their Texas heritage and think of themselves as Texans first and Americans second. A friend of mine even told me when she was in elementary school in Texas, they had to pledge allegiance to the Texas flag.

On two separate occasions, two different Germans disparaged the German province of Bavaria by referring to it as "the Texas of Germany." Seems that the Lone Star State has acquired an international reputation.

Not four hours after I received news of my impending doom trip to Texas, I saw an SUV with a Texas plate on it. And if that wasn't enough, it had a Texas flag sticker in the window. And if a person was dull enough not to realize the driver was, in fact, from Texas, it had a bumper sticker that read, "I'm from Texas. What country are you from?"

The audible thumping that was heard afterwards was my head repeatedly banging against my steering wheel.

Wish me luck. You can probably find me at the pawn shop buying a gun or at Tractor Supply Company buying a ginormous hat.

3 comments:

Anastasia said...

Don't worry about getting a gun or hat. Texans won't make fun of you when you show up in your hoop skirt with your mammy.

Law School Transplant said...

Oh snap, left them back at the plantation house, next to my cotton gin. The gun and hat will have to suffice.

Anonymous said...

It's funny that I have also never been to Texas and that my team is in the same competition...